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 Nepalese Males in US

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Posted on 01-25-05 10:06 AM     Reply [Subscribe]
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Nepalese Males in the US:

Not for academic purposes. Just for humor.

If you do not fit into any of these categories, feel free to create one for your self.

Class I

?Came to US on some fellowship or scholarship but never looked to go back to Nepal.
?Well established in the US and can talk in lengths about the corruption and poverty in Nepal but never/ rarely did anything to help improve situation.
?Have problems with their Americanized children. Most worried when they change their BFs and GFs like underwears.
?Stable life with multiple mansions at the suburbs and drives BMW or Lexus or Mercedes.
?Frequently demonstrates ?status quo? among other fellow Nepalese in the social gatherings.
?Tries to give details about his earnings, assets and savings indirectly and sometimes directly.
?will live rest of the life with the same heavy accent that their children have stopped correcting.

Subdivision:

?Wants to invest in Nepal without expecting profit as a gesture of love towards the country.
?Wants dual citizenship policy implemented in Nepal so that they can spend their retirements peacefully with the social security in dollars.
?wife still cooks, does the dishes, laundry, polish his shoe and put food on the table after 25 of living in the US.

Class II

?Professional, highly educated.
?Towards midlife, very high prospects with the career.
?Modest living and likes to eat Gundruk and Masyaoura occasionally, but Dal, Bhaat are must for the dinner.
?Does Yoga or joins fitness classes: health conscious.
?Does not smoke but drinks socially.
?Even owns or founded a company.
?Honors family values and talks to the kids in Nepali.
?Maintains a mini-mandir and visits every day to do puja-path.


Subdivision:

?Does not contribute financially and socially at all to Nepal by any means.
?Probably married to an American chic or divorced, disregards all Nepali social values and customs as primitive and useless.
?Thinks Nepal is a Hell and dissociates with roots and all the connections.
?Rarely mingles with or hates the Nepalese community for their congenital behaviors.
?Frequently identifies himself as an Indian.


Class III

?Has wide variety of sexual preferences/experiences based on color of hair, eye, skin or ethnicity or body size, shapes and types etc.
?Frequents bar, clubs, topless clubs, pool clubs.
?Rarely eats at so-called apartment:
?Socialization level: at the max.
?Variety of packs of condom underneath the pillow.
?Had limited educational success in Nepal but heavily spoiled in US.
?Owns a sports car and tons of loans.
?Subscriber of Playboy, Penthouse magazine, and Internet porno.
?Encyclopedia of adult film stars. Jemima? Candy? Well ask him.
?If talks in Nepali: M#$i? ma#$%&*ni are the most repeated word.

Subdivision:

?An export of mass production of some affluent school in Nepal.
?Some enjoyed the financial support from the beurocratic parent or owner of a established business house in Nepal and attending better schools.
?Thinks studies hamper his social life.


Class IV

?Recent arrival on DV lottery green card; ?Well established with stable ?jaagir? back in Nepal but came to US for better future prospects and financial gains.
?Occasionally feels derogated with oneself for the kind of work they have to do which is totally different from their professional life, but limits the feelings to themselves.
?Has changed mind of going back to Nepal 1000 times.

Subdivision:

?Calls the green card ?hariyo-patta? and boasts among others who are struggling to get one for long.
?Pays to get fake marriage license with a Hispanic or Mexican or White chic to get one (GC) and gets married in Nepal with janti and gaja-baja before getting a divorce here.

Class V

?Shows concerns for the condition of Nepal. Donates few bucks for the cause of Nepal.
?Talks about the preservation of culture, language and literature and what not, but names own children completely American and rarely talk to them in Nepali.


Subdivision

?Organizes social events where fellow Nepalese gets together and guff-suff (chat) over bottles of beer and liquor.
?Apparently active but hated by many from the community.
?Wants his name to be publicized everywhere.



Class VI

?Hard working,
?Attends school to maintain visa status.
?Frequently sends money back home to support family.
?Struggles to pay the bills and shares apartment with six other fellow Nepalese.
?Usually misses the T or bus stops because of the tiredness and working odd hours like security guards.
?Can be spotted in the parking lots, restaurants and bakeries
?May be legally illegal in status.

Subdivision:

?Smells like restaurant.
?Some have spent fortunes to bribe and get the US Visa.
?Likes Khaini or Balwan chap surti.
?Usually has Nepali girl friend/ wife and monogamous.
?Does ?Namaste? and wears ?Palpali Dhaka Topi? at the Nepali gatherings.
?Talks in a very typical Nepali.
?Improvement: Hindi only.
 
Posted on 01-27-05 8:57 AM     Reply [Subscribe]
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Major Division


a. drinks orange juice in the morning
b. drinks apple juice in the morning
c. drinks coffee
d. drinks tea
e. drinks mixed juice while talking in Engish with his wife/children
f. does not drink anything but talk in Englsin with his wife/children
g. drinks only coffee and does not say a word
h. drinks tea and talks in Nepali only in the morning
i. reads a news paper and leaves without saying a word because is not married/no wife/no children

Sub division

a. comes home from work and flips on the TV and sinks in a sofa
b. comes home and does not flip on the TV but sinks in a sofa anyhow
c. comes home, turns TV, sink in a sofa and flips channel until fingers start to sore
d. comes home, turns TV and *wants to sink in a cushy sofa* but does not find one and sit on a futon and start flipping channel until eyes and fingers start to hurt
e. does not come home - ---
f. comes home, flips on TV and and flips on naked women on naked channel :) start to snroe
g. comes home.


;

(shirish, thorough observation. As newused mentioned, this is the story of almost every new immigrant or even any person here and everywhere)
 
Posted on 01-27-05 9:07 AM     Reply [Subscribe]
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NK hazur, I fall in Division C subdivision G...

How about those who comes home, turns on the computer and starts flippin' webpages by webpages... eheh... Tryin' to find a sukumari kanyakumari for summer marriage plan?? :P

Ax bro, tyahi bhanya, ehehe... He just missed that catagory... :P
Unmarried H1B walas, ehehe... who, after hard day at work, come home and do whatever mentioned by NK in subdivision... :)
 
Posted on 01-27-05 9:18 AM     Reply [Subscribe]
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Yes, yes Kalanki that is subdivision h. :) are you the one who got married? congratulations!

If I were a man I would fall into Division G and subdivision g. Who said I am not boring??
 
Posted on 01-27-05 9:26 AM     Reply [Subscribe]
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NK hazur, hehe... hazur ko mookh ma skim-milk and Jasmine Rice... I am not the one who got married. Harey... I wish I were married... :P WANNA-BE-MARRIED matrai ho... hehe... shrimati lai mall ghumaune, eheh.. bachcha khelaune rahar bhaako ... :D

I think I fall in division W... for wannabees.. :)
 
Posted on 01-27-05 9:29 AM     Reply [Subscribe]
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Kalanki, What about those who chat and chat and chat and chat........ ?
 
Posted on 01-27-05 9:34 AM     Reply [Subscribe]
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NK and Kalanki... still snowing there?
 
Posted on 01-27-05 9:40 AM     Reply [Subscribe]
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Sitara hazur, those who chat and chat and chat would fall in whichever category I fall... Let me fall into some category first... ehehe... 5 years of chatting and haat laage zero... ooh... misery my misery... :P

Naah, not snowing, but it's cold as hell.... blue sky and lot's of sunshine, yet temperature is somewhere near subzero... :) In other words, I am freezin'... :) How I wish I were married re kyaa, winter dekhera.. :D
 
Posted on 01-28-05 12:00 PM     Reply [Subscribe]
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Well I guess there is another category of Nepali Males in the US:

Ones who are constantly on lookout for "personal business" of other Nepalese Males in the US and is determined to find why the heck are they involved in "so and so" personal business. Therefore endlessly spooking on other's personal matter and always not happy at the way others take care of their personal life.
 
Posted on 01-28-05 12:13 PM     Reply [Subscribe]
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I wonder where I fall..

thinking,
nakkali
 
Posted on 01-28-05 12:15 PM     Reply [Subscribe]
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Nakkali Kanchi,
I guess they are talking about Males... errrr or did i get it wrong.:p
Or are you?????? hmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmm;)

Indisguise:)
 
Posted on 01-28-05 12:44 PM     Reply [Subscribe]
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Hey!
what about Nepali females in US, does anyone has the female version for this, i am really curious to know.

but great writing, i wonder whether this is your thesis for PHD here, i mean where did you get so much time to write down all that.
 
Posted on 01-28-05 12:52 PM     Reply [Subscribe]
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Thanks to those who appreciated.

I have a Women's version but I thought that may be too touchy or personal for some.

I did request San to remove that thread.
 
Posted on 01-28-05 12:53 PM     Reply [Subscribe]
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Kalanki:

Don't yoyu see those TV adds about where to find girls near your neighbourhood. I forgot! you are the chatting types... but they are in the websites too i guess.
 
Posted on 01-28-05 1:11 PM     Reply [Subscribe]
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Manab..

".............find girls near your neighborhood....."

Do you mean 250$ hookers ?
 
Posted on 01-28-05 4:15 PM     Reply [Subscribe]
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well:

that is not i intended, but if have the experience, then go ahead. i ws only referring to the advertisements that shows that you can have fun over the telephone for God's sake.
 
Posted on 01-28-05 5:28 PM     Reply [Subscribe]
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well researched observation shirish jee
bravo
but i found myself split in two different catagory
is that possible?
or do i have dual personality?
Has wide variety of sexual preferences/experiences based on color of hair, eye, skin or ethnicity or body size, shapes and types etc.
?Frequents bar, clubs, topless clubs, pool clubs
Subscriber of Playboy, Penthouse magazine, and Internet porno.
?Encyclopedia of adult film stars. Jemima? Candy? Well ask him.
?If talks in Nepali: M#$i? ma#$%&*ni are the most repeated word.
+
?An export of mass production of some affluent school in Nepal
+
Hard working,
?Attends school to maintain visa status.
?Frequently sends money back home to support family
 
Posted on 01-28-05 5:39 PM     Reply [Subscribe]
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OK...let me pull out the things from the list and figure it out yourself where I actually fit in:

# Came to the US on some fellowship or scholorship and......never looked back...

#Can talk in lengths about corruoption andpoverty in Nepal..................but does not contribute to ...

# Has no problem changing GF when sees she is not fit anymore...why should I put up with someone who cant get along with me anymore. They do the same when they dont see me fit for them.

# Wants duel citizenship policy in Nepal........................so that I can spend rest of my retired life with $$$$ from saving and investments in the US.

# Professional...high prospect with career.

# likes to have daal, bhaat, gundruk and masauraa sometimes ...because it's good for change sometimes.

# Has Italian chick (though not married) , undervalues Nepali customs and cultural attitudes as incompatible with the western cultural attitudes therefore renderend useless when living in with the western culture.

# Hardly cares about other Nepalese.... thinks it is in the low priority list.

Has wide variety of sexual partner preferences based on hair color and skin color. Doesnt hesitate to use hookers when necessary.
 
Posted on 01-28-05 10:31 PM     Reply [Subscribe]
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shirish bro, really appreciate your effort :)

GOOD GOOING! Please post more!!

i dont think i sud say which category i fall in :P :P


 
Posted on 01-29-05 1:09 PM     Reply [Subscribe]
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Ghaar_Jawaii

Dude..... looks like you are going to be the icon of the next generation of "counter-culture" revolution in the context of Nepali socio-culture. Almost reminds me of the counter-culture movement of 60s and 70s.

Well, anyway I dont care much about what you believe in since it wont effect my life in any way...
 



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