Funny, maybe, but not entirely true...
umor
1. Only in America......can a pizza get to your
house faster than an ambulance.
NOT TRUE. DEPENDS ON CIRCUMSTANCES, BUT AMBULANCE USUALLY ARRIVES WITHIN 4 MINUTES AFTER 911 CALL. PIZZA TAKES AT LEAST 30 MINUTES.
2. Only in America......are there handicap parking
places in front of a skating rink.
WELL, PHYSICALLY CHALLENGED PEOPLE CAN WATCH. THEY NECESSARILY DON'T HAVE TO SKATE.
3. Only in America......do drugstores make the sick
walk all the way to the back of the store to get their prescriptions while healthy people can buy cigarettes at the front.
MARKETING PLOY OF DRUGSTORES
4. Only in America......do people order double
cheeseburgers, large fries, and a diet coke.
SOME PEOPLE JUST LOVES DIET FLAVOR.
5. Only in America......do banks leave both doors
open and then chain the pens to the counters.
IT'S HARD TO ROB A BANK, BUT EASY TO WALK OUT WITH A PEN IN THE POCKET.
6. Only in America......do we leave cars worth
thousands of dollars in the driveway and put our useless junk in the garage.
NOT ALL DO THAT
7. Only in America......do we use answering
machines to screen calls and then have call waiting so we won't miss a call from someone we didn't want to talk to in the first place.
SOME PEOPLE HAVE ANSWERING MACHINES TO RECEIVE CALLS WHILE THEY ARE OUT. SERIOUSLY!
8. Only in America......do we buy hot dogs in
packages of ten and buns in packages of eight. (THIS ONE ALWAYS BUGGED ME!)
YOU GOT ME ON THIS ONE.
9. Only in America......do we use the word
'politics' to describe the process so well: 'Poli' in Latin meaning 'many' and 'tics' meaning 'bloodsucking creatures'.
WORD "POLITICS" HAS NO AFFILIATIONS WHATSOEVER WITH LATIN WORD "POLY" NOR WITH ENGLISH WORD "TICK" (SPELLED CORRECTLY)
10. Only in America......do they have drive-up ATM
machines with Braille lettering.
NO DISCRIMINATION LAW
---- IN HUMOROUS DEFENSE OF AMERICA----
